Last Day

Today wound up being very low-key. Daddy and Jen had thought about going into town again, but the rainy weather deterred them and so they spent the day packing, and resting some. Jenny and I also spent a good bit of the afternoon watching episodes from the Sex and the City dvds Zach brought me back from China as my christmas present. =P

Then, tomorrow morning they fly back home. And then I'll get to the list of last baby shopping items that I've been needing to take care of but haven't gotten around to with guests here. All of a sudden Loki's arrival seems nearly upon us, and I'm struck at all the things left undone-- little things like buying diaper rash cream and nursing bras, and stocking up on paper goods and cat food to keep at home so we won't have to worry about buying them for a while. I'm really hoping that he holds off till Mom gets here in a few weeks, I'm counting on having her help around the house and with Loki in those early days.

We just got back from having dinner at the restaurant next door, and the woman who usually waits on us was there again and asking about the baby, commenting that it looks like he's dropped (I think so too, seeing as what I think is his butt and feet feel to be a good several inches below my ribcage, and instead I feel something pressing up against my right hipbone a lot of the time) and to be sure to let them know when he's born.

Holy crap, I'm gonna be a mommy... am I ready for this? I guess I am, about as ready as I'll ever be. I can't say I'm not scared or a bit freaked out about it all, but I'm also excited. I've been reading a few blogs of other women who gave birth in the past few months and reading their stories of mommyhood have been incredibly heartwarming (of course, there's also always the funny-yet-kinda-scary stories of things like projectile pooping). I don't think you can face something this huge without some fear and trepidation. But I also have some sense of the amazing wonderfulness of what is to come.

Earlier tonight I was feeling the lumps of my belly and thinking I felt a butt and back over on one side, and the familiar foot on the other, and it struck me-- that is my son. That is my little baby, inside there, a baby who will soon be here with us, and who will one day be walking around chasing the cat, and then going to school, and one day maybe getting married and having babies of his own. And it's all just so... amazing.