Screamy McScreamerson

Before D got sick, I felt like we had established a routine. An exhausting one at that, but there was at least the predictability. He'd eat, which took anywhere from 20-40mins, then be awake and fairly happy for another 20-30 mins, then he'd start to get fussy and tired so I'd try to get him to nap. Sometimes he'd go to sleep right away, other times take a while longer, and basically he'd sleep anywhere from 20 mins to 1 hour, waking up almost exactly 2 hours since his last feeding began, and we'd start the cycle all over again.

Then we spent a week in the hospital, and even once we came home we had Hank and Susan here, which has been great, but I feel like we've yet to achieve a similar sense of "normalcy." D's schedule has been all over the place, sometimes seeming hungry just 1.5 hrs since the last feeding, other times going 3 hours before getting hungry again. His naps seem to be shorter, though every once in a while he'll take a marathon 2-hr nap. I get the sense often that he'll wake up before he's really ready to, but won't go back to sleep despite lots of eye-rubbing and fussiness.

Last night I fed him around 6pm or so and he fell asleep on me. I set him down in his basket, which lasted all of about 10 minutes before he woke up SCREAMING. After several failed attempts at soothing him, by me, Susan, and Zach, I finally took him upstairs and put him on the boob again, and spent the next hour and a half sitting with him, as he ate some and slept for a while, too scared to try to set him down again (this whole comfort nursing thing can be a blessing and curse all at once). Just now I spent another 2 hours with him napping on me, not wanting to move him. When he did wake up he did so crying hysterically, and trying to feed him only seemed to make him madder. Susan came up and took him and was able to get him back to sleep. He did get his 2 month vaccines this morning, which may be contributing to this specific tantrum, but it still seems like he just spends so much time upset. The times that he is happy I'm scared to move him or do anything b/c I don't wanna piss him off.

The scary thing? I know he's not even that bad of a baby. It's not like he has acid reflux or colic. He sleeps well at night. We don't (yet) have any of those stayed-up-all-night-with-a-screaming-baby stories that every parent seems to have. He's absolutely adorable and so happy parts of the day. And still I sometimes feel like I'm being screamed at all the time. I'm having a hard time figuring out what's supposed to be "normal" for him-- Is he still feeling after-effects from the infection? Are the antibiotics messing with his system? Or now, the shots he got this morning? Or is this just what he's like at this point in time? Is this really even new, or am I only remembering "good" days from before and so he seems suddenly worse by comparison? Or is this just a random bad (couple) day(s)?

I think it's been a rough couple of weeks for all of us.