Monday, June 13, 2016

the night before

It's our last night before we take off for The Netherlands tomorrow. I am in the midst of every emotion you can imagine having before such an adventure. I'm feeling that heavy exhaustion deep in my chest and shoulders that comes from feeling stressed and excited and anxious and nervous all at the same time, trying to plan and pack and envision what the full packing job will look like but not being able to get it finished till the last minute and hoping, hoping, hoping it will all fit and be under-weight. Fighting that nagging feeling of I must be forgetting something.

I am excited about the apartment we got, what it will feel like to walk down those old city streets alongside the canals, the travel opportunities from Amsterdam. I am excited for the fries and waffles and hagelslag. I am also nervous about the flight, about how the boys will adjust, how long it will take us to get used to the time change. I know enough about going abroad to know how difficult and frustrating aspects of it can be. I am alternating between "this is going to be amazing!" and "What the heck did we agree to?"

It is also a bit surreal to go around our house and our bedrooms and try to tidy things up and imagine what it will be like to come back to these same spaces in 6 months.

It all feels a bit surreal. And somewhat overwhelming. I'm trying to just trust that everything will work out, and to enjoy as much of the experience as we can (and the rest will make for good stories, right?).

Unrelated, here are some of my recent posts on Medium:

How Do We Reduce Gun Violence?  On looking at the different factors that contribute to our culture of violence.

Men, We Need Your Voices. Realizing that the majority of people speaking about sexual assault are women-- and that we need men to speak out, too.

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